State of an introvert mindset

Abhishek koserwal
4 min readMar 3, 2018


“Close-up of tiny white flowers on dry branchlets with bokeh effect in the background” by Shelby Deeter on Unsplash

Being quiet and social awkwardness is often tagged with a label of “an introvert”. This label soon becomes a reality for you. It’s like an inception which gets deeply implanted inside your mind by the surroundings and events that restrain you from pursuing what you really wanted to do. Feeling of getting noticed but remain silent in your comfort zone is that what you start looking for in every occasion that you encountered. Overthinking comes as a gift with this comfort zone state. Doubting yourself for everything and constantly polling about the questions like go for it or stay quiet.

Looking out for people who might understand you and be expecting them to pamper you. This kind of “understanding imaginary” people only exist in fairy tales or movies. Where they can found out just by a glimpse of your eyes. They suggest you to be open, start going out, meet new people, or start enjoying your life. Your label of introvert start appears to be a problem, a disease that needed to be cured. You are strangled by this disease and hanging out with this so-called social accustomed people will cure your problem. But, reality is still you found yourself hiding somewhere in the crowd. All you find is endless emptiness. A void place inside you. You can’t explain or understand it, just a feeling that never goes away or is it fear of ending up lonely? Some call it as depression! Yes, now you know the name of this disease.

We start looking for remedies of this so called disease. First suggestion came out to be

“Reach out for help”.

Okay! I get this point let’s try to reach out for help, problem where? who? If I can find out people than why would be I seeking out for these kind of help at the first place. Finding out people that can help you is a tough job and that the solution is itself a problem, more like a recursive relation. Sometimes reaching out to people can increase the frustration by making it more complicated or make it worse, but ignoring your problem or giving non-sensible suggestions. Instead of listening to you, they will start suggesting you the same thing, go out or reach out to someone. They will never think, you are actually reaching out to them at that moment. And honestly, nobody seems to helping you out. Everyone leaves you this time. So, look out for yourself.

Next comes “Be +ve” advice !

You are drowning down the sea of endless negative thoughts and pondered with self-doubt in your abilities. You can try no matter, you are not in the state to utter even a single positive thought in to that little brain. Sitting at a place and thinking about being positive won’t going to help you much. You need to keep pushing yourself and trying to engage into things that could make your condition better.

Be Happy Advice !

Find what makes you happy ! If you are getting such type of suggestions. you are asked to seek, what you are not or you don’t know to be happy. It is true that you can’t be happy or sad all the time. Feelings will hits you like a wave. It is important to understand instead of fighting back against the feeling. You need to float with it. Believe in the situation and make your next move. Seeking happiness or sadness is like looking for a hidden treasure. It is not what you should seek for but let yourself discover it as a by product of your journey.

Introvert !

It is not a problem or an imaginary argument you should keep telling to yourself from preventing yourself going forward. It’s a natural trait, that defines you. In reality people don’t care about you, then why you should have a self imposed doubt. Be free from it. You create this state of mindset, which generate all kind of problems. Self-talk is the key which can make you or break you. Sometimes reading a book, listening to someone or watching a movie can change your view point or state for instance. But won’t last for long until you know how to re-fuel this state. Instead of looking for suggestions, try to learn ways to re-fuel yourself. Leave you with these lines..

You wanted to save
The world from all its wars -
And I told you to
First save yourself
From the world,
And all the wars
You put yourself

- Suzy Kassem



Abhishek koserwal

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